As any regular reader will know, this year has been a challenge in so many ways. But the chillies have been better than most previous years. Things got off to a bad start with most of my chilli seeds not being delivered which was no fault (well not completely) of the seed company. So instead of a big selection I ended up growing just three. Of course that is probably just as well because we don’t eat many if I am honest. I had the usual issues with snails that clobbered most of the seedlings in the greenhouse this spring and just about managed to get one ‘Elephant’, three ‘Carolina Reapers’ and ten ‘Red Cherry’ to maturity. And so we now have some chillies.

Rather than plant them in the polytunnel as usual, where they don’t do quite as well as I would expect, I grew them in pots this year in the greenhouse. They are in 20cm pots, and dry out very fast, but I am feeding them lots, primarily with MiracleGro and they are looking good in most cases. The first to crop and the only one to ripen, so far, is ‘Elephant’.

This is a beautiful chilli with corky stripes across the fruits. It is ‘native’ to Kosovo and has long chillies that can be 20cm long. Unfortunately I have a problem with them because, as they start to ripen, the blossom end starts to rot. The photo above is cropped to disguise the fact. I decided to pick it after I took the photo and cut off the rotten part and at the top – or is it the bottom! There are several more fruits and I hope, and expect, that the recent warm weather will mean that these later fruits will ripen properly. It is supposed to be mild and with good flavour. Now I have tried it I can affirm that the flavour is very mild. I treated it with respect but if there was a shock it was just how mild it was. I tasted a bit raw, ready to rush for the cheese to take away the pain but there was none. It is a good choice for chilli cowards. (Capsicum annuum)

By far the most productive chilli is what I am growing as ‘Red Cherry’, also know as ‘Small Red Cherry’, ‘Ciliegia Piccante’ or satan’s kiss (‘Baccio de Satana’). Despite the last name it is said to be only moderately hot. The plants are robust and bushy and each has dozens of fruit but they are obstinately green at the moment. The fruits should be 3-4cm in diameter but mine are rather smaller. I have grown red cherry chillies before and they are usually reliable and this one seems to be the same.

My three ‘Carolina Reapers’ are growing OK but are very prone to a hint of overwatering. But there are flowers opening now. Out of respect for superstition I won’t talk about them more until I get some fruits.

Every year I grow Padron peppers, with varying success. This year the plants in the pots have done very well. Padron peppers are one of those things you have on holiday but are never quite the same when you get home – like all those bottles of strange spirits that now fill my drinks cupboard. These small peppers are cooked by searing them in a pan over high heat so they get blistered and then drizzled in olive oil and salt and are the perfect tapas with a cold pint. Pick them up by the stalk and eat the pepper. They are slightly bitter and very enjoyable. I think the bitterness and saltiness contrasts with the sweetness and coldness of the lager. As I rarely sit to drink lager at home outside the stupidity of growing padron peppers is obvious. Plus, the cooking of anything over a hot, searing pan is almost impossible in our modern house decked in dozens of smoke alarms!

Yet I still try, even though I rarely eat any that I grow. That is not quite true because, if left on the plants to ripen, many of them become spicy and can be used as chillies. In fact, part of the fun in eating padron peppers is the ‘Russian Roulette’ phenomenon because a small proportion of them will be hot.

I think I need to get out the frying pan.

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